Suicidal Mind Vol. 12

Suicidal Mind Vol. 12

Writing, was my first hobby. I write on any piece of paper. I write with simple pen but when I learned how to earn money, as a kid, I write with beautiful and colorful pen and sometimes I use sign pen. I really loved and enjoyed writing. I write to what I cannot express to people, I write what I cannot say to my family and to others. And most importantly, I write to God.

Writing is not only an expression of how creative you are, it’s about expressing who you are and what you really are. Even if you struggle or experience writer’s block, you remain a writer. I never knew what a writer was like until I saw a quote saying, “a writer writes”. It made me realize what I really am. I struggle all the time to write what really wanna say but for me it’s a part of writing. I only struggle to the language that I use which is english and because of my depression that started when I was in high school, I forgot a lot of english words that I memorized because english was my favorite language and subject. My dialect is Tagalog/Filipino. So, if I will express my feelings in my own language, I know I can express everything. 

I don’t feel any pain right now, I only feel emptiness, loneliness and hopelessness that flows down through my veins and help me to process the words and let it spill. Though my words are not enough for anyone, it’s enough for me.

There’s no other way I could express what I’m feeling but write to write it.

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